Time for W(h)ine!

Do you have your glass of wine? Go ahead. I'll wait.

*elevator music plays softly in the background*

Um, you're gonna need to pour more in your glass than that. Now go! And hurry back! Don't spill any!

*elevator music continues*

Ah. Much better!

***

My favorite color and my best feature do not pair well.

That's right.....I have *dramatic music* the Pink Eye.

DISCLAIMER: My dates may be completely off. My head feels like death.

I totally am blaming the child on this one. One day my Mom told me to find alternative childcare for the day...looked like my dad had the Pink Eye. Done. Crisis averted. *mutters* Damn incubation period.

A couple days later, Monday, I took the Short One to the doc doc to see if she had an ear infection. While we were in. the. car. Lil Bit developed a wee little runny nose. Meh. It's normal. My allergies were raging, so I assumed hers were starting up since she had an allergy attack every time I did this winter. She weighed in at a whopping 20.4 pounds (always the tiny one...remember, she's 14 months, for crying out loud). The doc doc gets to us. No ear infection. No nothing wrong. Apparently she has been batting at her ear because of her molars coming in. Yay! I don't have to remember to give her an antibiotic every day! *a mist of impending doom fills the room* We get the heck outta dodge and back to la casa.

*Later that evening...actually like an hour after we got home* All of a sudden I notice an eye booger. Meh, maybe just allergies. She gets a wee bit goopier through the night. Nothing major. And *BAM* she wakes up the next morning and I have to pry her poor little eyes apart. I call the doc doc and they go ahead and call in a prescription for eye drops. Hubby watches her while I go to work. Lalala. We get her prescription that night and discover the joy of giving a 14 month old eye drops. -.- I would rather be tasked with remembering to give her a dose of amoxicillin every 5 minutes. And tell me this…how am I supposed to tell a 14 month old to gently close her eyes, not blink, and keep her eyes closed for 1 to 2 minutes!?!?!? Gah. I’m lucky if she doesn’t rub her eyes 3 seconds after.

The next day is fairly uneventful. Except that my brother-in-law decided to invite every frickin cousin in the area (a metric buttload) over for a BBQ. Wonderful. Pink eye kid. Allergy Mommy. Splendid. I spent the day on the couch watching DVDs and trying to relax on my day off of work while people swarmed my house.  Everyone finally left. And then it starts. My left eye began to ooze a little and ache. Greeeaaat. I kept waking up in the middle of the night prying it open b/c it was starting to swell and stick together. Ick.

So I go to the doctor Friday morning (like I said, brain is cloudy...no clue what happened Thursday...I know I worked Thursday, but no clue what else happened...maybe that night my eye started instead of Wednesday??? anywho...) w/ Short One in tow b/c all my go-to baby sitters were working and Hubs was completely exhausted from work. Worked out pretty good tho b/c I woulda been bored to tears without her. Lol. And she did really well strapped in her stroller for 2 hours. I was shocked!! I gave her a Martha Stewart LIVING to look through and she had it propped up, turning pages, and everything! But back to the story...I hadn't seen my Family Practitioner since I was in college back in like late 2005 to early 2006...I remember because I went in about my allergies, and I was living in the dorm that they tore down later on. So I had to come in as a new patient...which also meant more to pay than if I was existing. Boo. But it all worked out. Considering the puffiness and ooziness and the fact my Dad and Short One had been diagnosed with the Pink Eye, my diagnosis was easy peasy. He went ahead and did  once over anyway. Apparently I have an abnormal heart rhythm. Soooo they did an EKG, which turned out normal. That was the first time anyone other than my Hubs had seen my boob since I was breast-feeding. Ha! The little paper vest ripped as soon as I put it on because I'm awkward like that. Then I discussed a couple things with the doctor, and I will be returning early July to see if I need hormones. Until then I get to act like I'm trying to get pregnant and take my temperature at the same time every morning...AND write it down. Woo! So I guess some good did come from this mess. Aside from how sexy I look in the morning when my eyes are swollen shut. ;)

So there! Our inaugural Friday Night W(h)ine is complete! =)

Time for my eye drops. O boy. And then I will be calling it a night. I think I'm having a hot flash. Lol. Since I am writing this on a Saturday night/Sunday morning, disregard the loopiness.

Stay tuned for our beauty mission of the night!

Now go refill your glass! =)