Saturday, December 10, 2011

Ouiser and the Twenty Pound Bag of Potatoes

I just got off work about an hour ago and ran to the grocery store. Nothing unusual there really. I was only picking up some stuff for the Weeman, milk and the like (perhaps O's of Cheer with which to grind their souls into my carpet?). And there it was. Calling to me. Beckoning...BUY ME!!!

The display of 20 pound bags of potatoes.

I feel like Bubba Blue when I think of all the things I can do with potatoes...

Mashed Potatoes, Fried Potatoes, Boiled Potatoes, Potato Pancakes, Hashbrown Potatoes, French Fried on and so forth. MMMM Tatery Goodness...all carbs and starch and all those bad things we're not supposed to eat if we're trying to lose weight.

To that I say SUCK IT HOOKER.

With one swell foop, I snatched up a bag one handed no less and plopped it into my cart.

After I walked in the door it occurred to me.

What the Blue Hell am I supposed to do with TWENTY FREAKING POUNDS OF POTATOES????

But you have to admit, I did get a good bargain for my buck. Only 3.99 for the bag...Potato Soup, Baked Potatoes, Scalloped Potatoes, Julienne Potatoes, Au Gratin Potatoes, Latkes...

Weeman LOVES his potatoes too so, it's not like they'll go to waste, unless we don't use them.


At least it wasn't FIFTY...


Friday, December 9, 2011

Time To W(h)ine

*le sigh*

Today's rant is brought to you by the lifesuck, work, and the glory of chocolate. In lieu of wine tonight (because I must be at the lifesuck at 8:30am...and my wrist is insanely in pain, due to the life suck, and hubby is at work) I have a chocolate cheesecake sampler. Yummy! Perfect timing for them to mark one down 40% too.

A thought occurred to me today...being a mom is not for the faint of heart. Being a working mom is not for the faint of spirit. Being a working mom who never has a set schedule is like keeping 12 cats in a single bathtub at once for 18 hours a day. I can only imagine what being a single working mom is like.....I assume they would pretty much be vampires. When do they ever get sleep? BTW, I am currently waiting for Wubbzy to end so Lil Bit will go to bed. She has to catch her stories, don't'cha know.

I'm not ungrateful to be working. I want to make that clear from the start. However, a full 8 hours of sleep should not be much to ask for. I am only a part time employee. The week before last I was scheduled for 25 hours...lower than normal, but at least I had a few days to get things done. Last week, however, I was scheduled 40 hours. Four. Zero. Forty. Whiskey. Tango. Foxtrot. So I worked 8 hours a day (a rare occurrence in itself) for 5 days straight (a rarity as well). Well, almost. The fifth day i clocked in 2.5 hours late due to a communication issue between me and the hubby. He thought he had to be home to watch the baby in time for me to be at work at 11am. Nope...8am. Sooooooooo he got home at 9am. But these things happen. At least the day flew by once I got to work.

Anywho, 5 days straight. And today, this lovely Friday, is my off day. My only off day. Tomorrow I start another 5 days straight. Only 38 hours though. The bad news is that I have to be there at 8:30am the next 3 days and 8am the last 2 days. I. Will. Never. Get. Sleep. Again. The check right before Christmas will be spectacular. But seriously, I need sleep at some point. I forgot to mention I have to take hubby to work every night at 10pm and pick him up at either 6am, 6:30am, or 7am. And between pm and am I have to get the baby to bed and find some time to sleep myself. The house can suck it. If I have to choose between 5 hours of sleep and a clean kitchen, I'd rather get a little shuteye.

I just need sleep. I had to pick hubby up this morning and decided to stay up and spend a couple child-free hours with him while lying under the covers on the couch as we watched music videos on the XBox. Romantic, eh?

Before i forget, the beauty mission for today is to go take a nice, hot, long shower. Send the kiddos to bed, hubby, the neighbors, Timbuktu, wherever. Just make sure you have as long as you want to let the hot water hug you. I did that earlier and felt like a new person afterwards. Also, eat some chocolate. Don't question my methods, just do it. If you need to add something beauty-specific, do something you have been neglecting to do due to quick showers before you pass out...or if you are like me, the kiddo is usually in the shower with you, therefore razors stay outside of the shower on the bathroom counter.

And now, an ode to the wonderful ladies at ...if not for these ladies, I would be a wreck. I would still be thinking I had to be Perfect Mommy. Bump that. There are Cheerio souls all over my floors and I really don't care right now. Bedtime is close, as is my cheesecake time. Anywho, I now present you with:

Domestic Enemies Of The Working Mom With An Ever-Changing Schedule

1. Disorganization
I was not born an organized person. Far from it. But this whole crazy schedule makes it 1,000,000 times worse. My bills are always late because I always forget where I put my mail, and that means I never know how much I owe or when it is due. Bleh. I can never really meal plan. I can never really even cook some nights. I get home and have just enough time to sit down and let my feet get a little relief until it's time to take the hubby to work, kid in tow. And to make me feel even suckier, I feel like no cleaning ever gets done. I try to establish a cleaning schedule, but then fate intervenes and on my big kitchen day, I instead have to work 10am-7pm. Great, there's my whole day.

2. Kiddo Non-Schedule
Every house has a basic schedule. Everyone has there set wake-up time, breakfast time, bath time, bed time, dinner time, nap time. etc. Most even have an evening TV schedule. Not me. Not my kiddo. Lil Bit wakes up sometimes as early as 8:30am or as late as 10:30am. Of course, that will change when brother-in-law moves out since she will have to get up and go with to pick daddy up. I can't wait! *dread* Nap time is typically 3 hours from when she gets up. She is usually ready around Noon and sleeps for 3 hours. But, due to scheduling conflicts, nap time has to be postponed. If hubby is watching her, but has to work that night, he will lay her down 2.5 hours from the time I get off work. After a 20 minute drive, I get home with enough time to sit down and turn on the TV or grab some food before she is up and at em for the afternoon/evening. Dinner time? Really? We grab food whenever we can. Today we had yumy sammiches with daddy before about 8pm. Bed time is an oddball. Sometimes she will lay down easy peasy at 11pm as long as we get home in time for Nina on Sprout to say good night to Hush the fish and for her to sing the good night song. If we get home after 11pm, like tonight since we had to run in for a couple groceries, we stay up and watch Wubbzy and Kai Lan for a bit. Long story short, we fly by the seat of our pants all day.

3. Who Is That Guy In My Bed???
Since our schedules are so vastly different, hubby and I have the opportunity to sleep together in the same bed only a few times a month. We only actually sleep in the same bed once every month or two. That is probably the #1 suckiest thing about me working crazy hours during the day (anywhere from clocking in at 8am and clocking out at 9pm) and hubby working 10pm-7am. I miss cuddling. =(

4. Childcare
I am blessed in this department. I have my mom, 2 sisters-in-law, and my hubby to choose from. However, this can bite me in the butt too. Since they aren't paid, they can refuse (except hubby, of course). If I end up childcareless, I have to come up with a reason to go to the doctor so the absence is excused. Hooray for my HRA!

5. Too Much Month, Not Enough Money
Seriously, how can 2 people be working and still barely get by, financially???!!!??? This is getting ridiculous. I want to quit and just stay home. At least I would save on gas and have a cleaner house. Of course, luxuries like food and electricity are nice too, so I must keep the lame job that makes me all stabby on a daily basis.

Props to all the mamas out there busting hump every day. I don't know how we do it. Will someone come start my IV drip of caffeine? Also, I have a pimple on my shoulder and no hubby home to look at it. =( Work can suck it.

<3 Truvy

Tuesday, December 6, 2011

And A Partridge In A Pear Tree

Ouiser here, and I super suck.

Between work and the Wee Man (and the time suck that is Facebook Games) I've not been...bloggy as I should be. That is soon to change however. We hope at any rate. Speaking of changes...

First off: NotQuiteHubby has been upgraded. He is now officially HUBBY. Yup, just barely a month after the ink dried on my divorce decree, we took the plunge (again). So now between us we have 4 kids and 6 marriages*lol* Third times a charm right? (If not, I am NOT doing this again. Ever. For reals...)

Secondly, I'm finally finding some time to start clipping my Q's again. The Q's as of late have been Totally Awesome and I'm getting back to saving my usual 35 percent, which comes in quite handy when accruing Kroger Fuel Points, thereby allowing me to purchase my gas for less than three dollars a gallon. Now that I have a newer car this is a good thing.

Yeah, I finally had to concede that Vince (my 12 year old, but brought brand-spankin-new with only 153 miles on it year 2000 Neon) was no longer suiting my needs. The final straw (or nail in his coffin if you will) came when I was pulling out of my parking lot at work and MY REAR BRAKES SHATTERED AND LOCKED UP.

Two hundred dollars later (thanks Mom!) I found myself in the possession of a newer (thanks new inlaws!) Ford Taurus of which I'm now making payments of 200 dollars a month on. So I sold Vince. At a loss obviously*lol* 400 dollars. Better than nothing I suppose.

We're also planning on moving again. While the Eight Legged Invasion has ceased, we've discovered that we really just live TOO far out in the MIDDLE OF NOWHERE and it's costing us a fortune (see gas consumption). So come April (yay for tax refunds and bonuses from work!) we're packing up (again) and moving closer to where both our jobs are. Hubby's job is moving to a new facility which is only a mile and a half away from my store so it makes sense to move closer back into town. I am NOT looking forward to packing everything up again but it'll be worth it in the end methinks.

The goal at some point is to become more financially solvent so I can perhaps QUIT my job (thankless, no benefits, I pissed off corporate so I'll never move up in the company) and return to school to obtain a degree in nursing. This will also allow me to spend more time with the Wee Man and see if we can't get to the bottom of his behaviour problem. He's very mean, slaps, bites, hits, headbutts (I even lost a tooth because of this) and will not listen (he can hear just fine but listening is totally different). Thing is, he's only like this to ME, not his daddy or anyone else. I think the boy hates me. :( now we're in the final stretch of the Holiday Gamut, and I have bought only ONE thing...which hopefully will get here BEFORE Christmas. The bulk of my shopping will be done online, but I'm also doing a stocking stuffer gift for everyone involving gifts in a jar....It's multipurpose see? Yes the initial investment of the ingredients and jar may be a wee pricey(not much though because I buy in bulk from a place called The Country Pantry, which is a Mennonite run store here in town) but the jars can be reused etc, so the investment will be worth it.

After the holidays Truvy and I will be back (hopefully) a little more often with all the randomness and money saving ideas so you can have your own Champagne Mommyhood (on a beer budget!)


Tuesday, November 8, 2011

We super suck.

There should be more hours in a day.

Truvy here. I am working on organizing my life and I promise to pencil this blog back into my schedule. I miss ranting to the interwebz. =)

In addition to a hubby, home, and child, I am getting full time hours at work due to the holiday rush's beginning, as well as trying to start my own crafty mama business. And the short adorable monster has 6 teeth coming in and an itchy rash on her booty. Oi!

And now for a goody. =) I was perusing the local Walgreen's ad and found some splendid deals! Check your local ad since deals tend to change from area to area. The BEST is on Vitamin Water and Smart Water...I saw Smart Water at Walmart last night for $1.58....I said "no thank you" and moved on. But this week at Walgreens, both brands are $1 each. When you buy 3 you get a $2 Register Reward (RR), making them 33 CENTS each! Another notable deal is on Suave products. I tend to have a decent Suave stash in my coupon binder. Anywho, buy $10 worth of product (check your ad for types and sizes) and receive a $3 RR. Perfect opportunity to stock up on lotion, body wash, deodorant, etc. And just in time for chapped lip season, you can get Blistex Revive and Restore Lipcare for FREEEEEEEE. One of my favorite words! You pay $1.99 and get a $1.99 RR right back. =) Last but not least, I have been lusting over the fancy Lysol No-Touch Soap Pump. Pay $11.99 at the register and get a $5 RR, making it only $6.99, which is cheaper than I have seen it at Walmart. Need an idea for all of those RRs? Break your orders into multiples. Say you get 12 waters and $10 worth of Suave. Do a trasaction of just waters...receive $$8 in RRs. Use that to pay your Suave order. If due to coupons your order is less than $8, toss in the Blistex or some candy to use the rest of the RR up. Use any RRs leftover on the grocery items on sale or rack up some of the deals in the Christmas section. =D I can't wait til Thursday! Come on payday!!

And one more nifty thing I found in my email today. Vocalpoint ( is giving away 100 $25 American Express gift cards to spend at small businesses on Small Business Saturday (the day after Black Friday). check it out here:

Ouiser has been working her tailfeather off as well. And her adopted cat (the cat adopted her when she moved to the neighborhood) has been rewarding her Lol. Hopefully she will get a chance to hop on and update at some point.

<3 Truvy

Wednesday, September 14, 2011

One If By Land, Two If By Sleigh

*mount horse*

The holidays are coming! The holidays are coming!

Truvy here. =)

I am so freakin excited that I should probably be locked up. The holidays are my favorite time of the year! I am currently crocheting a variety of pumpkins. In a couple weeks I hope to move onto Christmas items. =)

A decent amount of the Christmas shopping is already done or at least planned (pictures for Christmas. perfect!!) and I already know where my tree is going. =D

Stay tuned for more holiday posts of awesome coming soon!

<3 Truvy

Tuesday, September 13, 2011

I'm A Mess

Truvy here. We suck. Too much craziness (and laziness) going on lately.

Let's see...what's been going on......Oh! I know! So, gross but weird fact about me....I had my first post-partum period when Lil Bit was 5 months old. I had my second post-partum period when she was 17 months old. A month or so before the second reared it's insufferable head I had made an appointment with the endocrinology specialist down here to figure out what was going on. So of course I started 2 days before my appointment. Well, he ordered blood tests and put me on birth control. By the way, my brith control is awesome 24 days of the pack. It's chewable and minty and sweet!! The last 4 days of the's chewable and tastes like seafood roadkill that has been laying in the sun for 3 days. Anyway, back to the point. Two weeks later I went for a follow-up for the lab work. Turns out I'm fat. Who knew!? My cholesterol is a little high, so is my blood sugar. I'm still waiting for word on the follow-up labs for the blood sugar deal. Bleh. So I am now on Metformin as well.

I am also on a 2000 calorie a day diet. Doable. But the kicker? I am supposed to have 1000 healthy (no breads, excessive sugars, etc) calories for breakfast, 500 for lunch, and 500 for dinner. How do you get that many calories into 5 seconds before you rush out the door? How do you pack 1000 calories into any amount of time without eating any type of bread? The doctor said to have a single boiled or scrambled egg and a bowl of oatmeal. That is not 1000 calories. So one day I doubled up the oatmeal. I could barely finish it, let alone eat anything else. This will be challenging for sure.

Health tip of the day: Do you know how much water you are supposed to drink? Say you weigh 200 pounds. You divide your weight by 2. Leaving 100. That is how many ounces you are supposed to drink. I calculated it all out. You know those 16.9 ounce bottles of water? I'm supposed to drink SEVEN of those each day. And somehow not have to invest in a life raft. On a good day at work I can get in maybe 7. One before break, one during and after break, one after lunch, one during and after next break, and take one home to drink on. I may squeeze in another when I take my pills at night. Unless I have delicious soda. Mmmmmmmmm.

So this week's grocery shopping trip (where I might have a little room to actually buy plenty of nutritious snacks) I plan to ensure healthy and yummy snacks and meals for each day. Luckily in the produce section at WalMart they have these mini veggie trays w/ a small cup of ranch dressing (I didn't even use all of it), a stick of cheese, a handful of almonds, some carrot sticks, and some broccoli. Perfect to take to work for my 15 minute breaks. Or just purchase on my way to the break room. (Yes, I'm a slave to the Wal.) Maybe even add in a banana every once in a while.

I'm growing more and more optimistic, even though I have this weird thing where I am super picky about food. Most fruits and vegetables I can't handle. I like apples, bananas, sometimes oranges (don't like the pulpiness), green grapes, broccoli, carrots, spinach, lettuce, onion only when deep fried in ring form, peas, potatoes, and I think that's pretty much it. I'll eat tomato sauce, but not tomatoes. And if there are bell peppers, you can forget it. Or olives, or pickles...unless it is sweet relish in tuna salad or potato salad.

I am a mess. No doubt about it. But I will hopefully be here more to vent, entertain, and inform.

On a different note, I have recently discovered the art of crochet. And I am hopelessly hooked. Teehee. Ouiser and I are happy hookers, yes we are. Stay tuned for potential pictures of our endeavors.

<3 Truvy

Tuesday, August 2, 2011

Moving on a Beer Budget....EPIC FAIL

Ouiser here. A few weeks ago, NQH and I found a nice little house in the country. Nice yard for Wee Man to run around in, MUCH larger than the mobile home we'd been living in. So we decided to go ahead and rent it.

With our cash in hand and hope in our hearts, we set out to plan the perfect MOVING ON A BEER BUDGET.

Little did we know...

Five days later we FINALLY got everything in the house. Now it looks like a house threw up in my house. This house is now my worst nightmare. As for the budget? pfffrrtt out the window it went...


Enlisting in the help of our babyminders, Chris and Lauren, we start boxing things up to be taken over. We'd planned on staying at the trailer til we got everything moved as the big bulky stuff would be the last to go. We started out strong on Wednesday afternoon until around 6pm, when we discovered that the water in the trailer had been cut off already. Okay, no biggie, we've got the air conditioners we bought earlier, just pop em in and we're set right?


The outlets in the den and the masterbedroom were kaput. No air. Too hot for us to stay so we end up going to...


It was a Super 8. Nice room, comfy happiness abounds. Granted, there went 130 bucks. And Wee Man WOULD NOT SLEEP. Sleep just was NOT gonna happen. He cried and whined ALL night because I'd forgotten to bring PILLOWMONKEY with us. Pillowmonkey is a mini pillowpet in the shape of a monkey. He loves the thing and sleeps ON it. Without Pillowmonkey, the world will end. The End.
I even resorted to reading him The Lovesong of J Alfred Prufrock. It worked for about ohh...ten minutes. I finally had to put him in bed with me. NQH slept on the other bed. By slept I mean snored. Loudly. Enough that between Lumberjack Man and Wee Whiny Man. Mommy's Schmidt Level was creeeping up.

Day Two-

Eating, packing, moving, sweating. More eating. We had another helper that day and to celebrate getting all the big stuff over to The House From Hell, we went to Logan's for dinner.

One Hundred and Thirty Dollars Later...

Mommy hasn't eaten her dinner. She's too busy trying to keep Wee Man from stealing things off her plate, too busy trying to keep him entertained. He's whiny. The sound of everyone's voices is grating on my last nerve. Wait, I HAVE NO NERVES LEFT...Mommy's in Code Red. One more whine and Mommy's gonna SNAP.

My dinner when I did finally get to take a bite of my steak? SUCKED DONKEY BALLS.

At least the potato was good. I think anyway.


Late start due to NQH having his physical therapy appointment. Mommy gets some retail therapy at Borders.

I bought "Go The F*** To Sleep"

I thought it was fitting.

Eat, go back to the trailer to get the rest of the stuff packed.

And the electricity, which was supposed to have been turned off at noon, but wasn't as of 6pm finally gets cut off in the middle of trying to get the rest of the stuff packed. At 8pm.

Get the stuff to the house. Take one look around and go "Fuck it".

We go back to the motel. It's the weekend rates.

One Hundred and Thirty Dollars Later....

Wee Man sleeps, Our helpers sleep, NQH sleeps. I FINALLY sleep.

Day Four.

I have to work PRAISE WHICHEVER DEITY YOU SO CHOOSE TO WORSHIP. EVERYONE has finally grated on my nerves enough that I'm ready to bite folks heads off. I take it out on my customers instead. Fun times for all.

Day Five.

Everything's moved in. My house looks like a house threw up in it. We sleep in our own bed. Now the fun begins...

SPIDERS SPIDERS EVERYWHERE!!! We killed a metric assload of the evil eight legged bastard freaks BEFORE we started moving stuff in, We sprayed for them...

AND THEY'RE EVERYWHERE. I start digging through boxes to find my monitor cord for the desktop computer. THEY'RE IN MY BOXES. I kill one in the kitchen. I kill two in the baby's room. I killed HOPEFULLY TWO in my boxes in the bedroom. This was good for a good fifteen minutes of screaming, running in circles and crying hysterically as um...I'm scared of spiders. Seriously. I refuse to unpack another box. End of story.

What should have been something simple has now turned into a nightmare. Til the spiders are gone. I shall not sleep.

Let's not even talk about the corn...

Tuesday, July 26, 2011

Day 1...FlyLady BabySteps Challenge

Allllrighty! I finished the last of my note cards just now. =) About to go actually DO Day 1's mission. And hem a nightgown. And update my calendar. =) I love being off of work.

If anyone would like to join me in the pursuit of a effortlessly tidy home, feel free. =)

<3 Truvy

Maidless Mondays: I Knew I Grabbed The Purple Sharpie For A Reason...

Ok. So my life is kind of a train wreck at, always. Lol. I overextend and overcommit and feel like I am pulled in a million directions at once.

I have written before about the genius that is (if you have not checked this site out DO. IT. NOW.). The system works if you work the system, as they say. I always get excited, get started, and do too much...every single time. I'll write out the 31 Babysteps on my calendar, not allowing myelf room to fall behind and get back on the band wagon.

So tonight I have a revelation...notecards.

So here I am with leftover notecards from God only knows when and a purple sharpie. I am about to write 1 Babystep per notecard. That way, I can go through them daily, but if I hit a bump in the road, I can put things on pause, and even rewind if needed. =)

You can find the Babysteps here:

Note: I am only writing them down b/c when I get on the computer, I tend to stay there for a while. =p So if I say I'm gonna hop on real quick to see today's BabyStep, I may get off in 3 hours. Lol. So notecards are more of a discipline thing I suppose. Use whatever method works for you. =)

Your mission, should you choose to accept it, is to begin FlyLady's BabySteps and get on the right track to FLYing!

<3 Truvy

Monday, July 18, 2011

Maidless Monday - It CAN Be Done!

Okay, so I started on Maidless Monday at my house on Sunday night. =p I hopefully will continue for a few more hours since I am off Sunday and Monday. =)

First off, my house is a complete disaster area. I get stressed when I try to think of where to start. I think I've mentioned this before, but I am a FIRM believer in the FlyLady method (!! Tonight I used the Bingo system ( to do a quick clean WITH RESULTS! I decided I would do a 6x5 Bingo...6 tasks, 5 minutes each. I wrote down my tasks.

1. Unload and reload dishwasher.

2. Clear table.

3. Clean kitchen.

4. PUPA (pick up and put away) living room.

5. Reboot laundry.

6. Swish & swipe. (

Easy enough.

I posted on my personal facebook what I would be doing and decided to call the numbers on my personal wall. That way, if something popped up, like a baby who decides midnight is morning, I could put a pause on my list and not have to keep up with someone else's pace.

First I called #3...something that really needed to be done, and something I knew would look like I made a dent in it to get me motivated. The rest of numbers went 2, 6, 5, 4, 1. I saved the dishes for last...they have I knew they would take a little bit of scrubbing time. Took about 20 minutes actually, but it was DONE!

The best thing about this is that you don't see a huge pile of muck in front of you. You set small goals for yourself. A little at a time. And you would not believe how much you can do in 5 minutes!!! Seriously, pick something that you have been dreading (maybe going through the closet and decluttering clothes, or cleaning out the storage room, or that lovely pile of mail accumulating on your know the one....the kids have put up mini falling risk signs around it b/c it's bound to become a landslide soon). Set a timer for 5 minutes. ATTACK!!! When the timer beeps STOP. Do not touch anything else. Then walk away, grab a snack or something to drink. Then go back and look at what you have just accomplished. Be amazed!!!

Your Maidless Monday Mission is to apply the story of the tortoise and the hare to your housework...instead of rushing and ripping through things, take things a little at a time. You are much much less likely to burn out.

<3 Truvy

Wednesday, July 13, 2011

Rock Mama

Ok, so I'm probably driving Ouiser crazy with my incessant Facebook messages and updates, but I'm feeling the music itch......and I promise it's not one of the 20 mosquito bites I got at work. lol. It all started with Gnomeo and Juliet....they kept playing songs that were also in Moulin Rouge. So then I watched Moulin Rouge. I considered watching Repo! The Genetic Opera, yet again, but opted for some Facebook. Then of course I began looking up Moulin Rouge videos on Youtube and posting them to my FB wall and my hubby's wall. Then I stumbled across a hidden track from a Fall Out Boy album....and I was hooked. lol. Just so you know.....I am FOB obsessed. I was overcast Kids FAN OF THE MONTH June 2008. Suck it! I was hand-picked by the band! Muahahahaha. So after posting a few FOB videos, I remembered a mixtape Decaydance released a couple years back before the release of Folie a Deux. And of course had to track it down. =D

My point is easy to lose ourselves into our mommyhood. Sometimes we need to step back, throw on our favorite tunes, and let loose! So your mission for today is to track down something you haven't listened to/watched/done in a while, and have fun! =D

Stay tragic.
<3 Truvy

Monday, July 11, 2011

Maidless Mondays - Organizing Your Space

Hello Hello!
Good Monday Morning!

Today we are going to talk about organizing. Before you freak, let me tell you...I am not an organized person. At all. I try though. So here is my big organization project....

I am currently turning my dining area (open floor plan working on limited space. lol!) in a dining/office/craft area. Heh? Heh? Sounds fun, right?

So here is what I have done already....I moved a small, black, rectangular folding table from my bedroom to the dining room and pulled the table closer out toward the living area/hallway to the back bedrooms. I then put the printer on the table and assigned an area for the cubby i ordered last week. ( in green! I used the $25 Bed, Bath, and Beyond gift card I won from SwagBucks (Truvy's referral = Ouiser's referral = to be posted) so I only ended up pay $ should be here between July 12th and 17th!!!) When it gets here, I have a basket that will sit on top of it and boxes of stuff that will go inside of it. =p I also took a basic plastic 3-drawer cart (minus the rolly wheels) and stuck it underneath the black table to give some added stash space. Currently it holds fabric scraps and mis-matched Lil Miss No-No shoes. =p With the dining room table I intend to keep the sewing machine down at one end and use the middle and opposite end for dining. I am so thrilled! And once the cubby gets here it will be complete! I can't wait!

I also finally got a coupon binder! WalMart has some zip-up binders for only $10 right now in the back-to-school section that have a 2-part file folder of sorts on the outside, a mesh zip pocket, and a decent size zip pocket that can hold full-size scissors, pens, store cards, whatever else you may need. WalMart also has the baseball trading card sheets. I got 2 packs of 35 for about $5 each. Fits perfectly for now...may need another pack in a couple weeks, but perfect fit for now! So I can tell what section is what, I simply cut a 3" x 5" index card in half so I have 2 3" x 2.5" cards and wrote my sections on there. I can give a more in-depth tutorial if ya'll like, as far as the sectioning is concerned, but it's pretty basic. =) My coupon binder's home is in the space between the top of the plastic drawers and the bottom of the black table. Perfect fit!

So your Maidless Monday mission is to find a spot or activity (in my case: home paperwork, laptop, coupons, crafts) that has exploded all over. If you don't have the time or resources to get the job done today, do what you can. Come up with an idea of how you want it to look in the end. With the colors and clean lines, I already know mine will have a modern feel, but will be extremely functional. Maybe you just need to go through your kitchen drawers and cabinets and think of a way that everything will fit a little better. My old apartment's kitchen was super tiny. We had 3.5 cabinets up top, 5 on bottom, and 3.5 drawers. Not the easiest for a family of 3, plus roommates. Now I have a huuuuuuuge apartment kitchen. I think the kitchen (and the fake hardwood that you can not hurt except maybe by melting it) is what really won me over. It is gorgeous. It has a built-in pantry. It makes me swoon. My heart literally would beat faster every time I saw it before we moved in. lol!

Anyway, the point being, if you need any assistance in making small places and even smaller budgets work, we are your girls. We make it work somehow. =p

<3 Truvy

Well I'll Be....

Kinda bass-ackwards, but I found a way to update le blog.

So, unless blogger goes all ha-wire again, I'M BACK!

Friday, July 8, 2011

Due To Technical Difficulties...

Also known as Blogger isn't working properly for our Truvy (it keeps eating her posts but says they've posted) This weeks Friday Night W(h)ine will occur at a later date.



Friday Night Mommy's W(h)ine - Casey Anthony Edition

Mommy on the Fly---Staycation Edition 2011

Here in the wonderful world of Ouiser, we have the much anticipated VACATION coming up next week. Originally, NQH had put in a request for the same week so we could enjoy this time together, however, he did not get the requested days off (thanks ASC!), which now invariably means I have to come up with a completely NEW plan of how to fill seven glorious NON WORK days (in a row) with entertainment that doesn't involve punching keys on a computer or clicking a mouse or sitting on the sofa like Al Bundy, complete with my hand down the front of my pants. (which for some reason I've discovered I do this as I sleep, well not really, more like I stick my thumb in the waistband on my pjs and the rest of my hand is OUTSIDE my clothing. I have no idea why I do this other than it keeps my arm from falling asleep or something.)

Given that it's now FRIDAY and I was just informed TWO HOURS AGO that all my ideas have been pretty much obliterated by NQH not getting his vacation request (thanks again ACS!) I now have til MONDAY to come up with something different. So I was thinking...since this will be a STAYCATION (how lame is that really?) I'm thinking a few day trips are an idea. I want to do something fun, something educational that WeeMan will enjoy other than his usual daily fare of eat, poop, beat the crap out of Mommy and cry.(not necessarily in that order mind you, sometimes beating the crap out of Mommy comes first)

So far I have this: Jefferson Davis Monument

Let's learn about the only President of the Confederacy!

this: Customs House Museum (a museum here in Clarksville, I've always liked this place and it's been years since I've been) Historic Collinsville.

Thing is, I dunno if WeeMan would get anything out of this though. Any of it. So we'll update this post periodically next week during the actual Staycation. Stay tuned to see what we did!

Tuesday, July 5, 2011

The Day Mommy Got OLD

Ouiser here.

If you haven't figured out by now, I'm a bit um...older...than our Truvy and M'Lynn (who's been super busy with a sick LO to boot hence she's not posted yet) and probably most of our reading audience by about um...10 years or so give or take a few years. Now granted, this isn't actually a big deal. NQH is a little over 10 years older than ME so, who am I really to talk right?

Until last night.

Over the weekend, in addition to holiday gluttony, I worked a bit of overtime at the store. Yeah, I work at a c-store. I generally only work 29 hours a week. Just this side of the 'enough to be considered full time' border. (28 hours) This week I worked 40. Eleven of those hours were by myself. No help. No nothing. Granted, I DID work overnights for three years BY MYSELF but now...

Mommy got old suddenly overnight it seems.

Friday wasn't too bad even though I'm normally off that day, Saturday...okay this is starting to hurt a bit. Sunday...



And I can not move properly now.

I get home to eat some dinner, take a muscle relaxer and promptly have to go baste myself in what I like to call 'Old People Cream'.

Me. Old?

*runs to look in mirror*

Ugh. Fine lines already.

Wait! What in the blue hell is THAT?

Aw hell no!

It's a gray hair. GRAY!! I've pulled out platinum before. Platinum is classy. GRAY is not so much.

What's sad is I found my first one at seventeen. Needless to say, I've been coloring my hair ever since. As in, I just colored it not even 2 months ago. AND I FOUND A GRAY ONE AGAIN ALREADY!!!

I told Truvy about this, she mentioned that she could see me in about 20 years or so wearing a 'rocking grandma' tshirt or some such. I told her that if I was a grandma at 54 to just push me into the grave since I've already got one foot on a banana peel it seems!

Saturday July 2nd 2011.

The Day Mommy Got OLD.


Saturday, July 2, 2011

Friday Night Mommy's W(h)ine

It is currently 11:47pm on Friday. There is still time!

Pamper Mission:
Paint your piggies!
I painted mine this color: The red color. It's called Tango. Super fun for summer! The green color, Mojito, formerly graced my toes. But, alas, a change was called for...that and the fact that i couldn't FIND my Mojito. Lol.

Wine of the evening;
Barefoot Moscato.
It's Bugs Bunny-approved. =)

Great Value Teriyaki Beef Jerky. Don't hate. ;)

The Rules.
More specifically how people blatantly disregard them.
See also: Sense of entitlement.

I happened to have left the channel on some channel and some show about lifeguards (sans-Hasselhoff) came on. It was a reality show. One part had this young couple who were very obviously drunk. And swimming. Not safe. Duh. Also, this is a dry beach, meaning no alcohol allowed. So the lifeguards ask the couple to not go back in the water until they sober up and were prepared to leave them be...but then the girl just HAD to put in her two cents. They would ask her to sit down so they wouldn't have to worry about her running back into the water and potentially drowning, and she kept refusing. She wouldn't cooperate and was deadset on doing whatever she wanted to do with no regard to the rules or her own personal safety. Eventually the police were called. When she wouldn't cooperate for them, out came the cuffs.

Why does it even have to get to that point? Can't we just assume that, for the most part at least, the rules are there for a reason? People are complaining about new pool rules at my apartment's pool. These include:
-Only 2 guests at a time per household, and they must be accompanied by an adult resident.
-No throwing balls in the pool, or anything else.
-No jumping in.
-No toys of any kind (just added).

And many people think this is unreasonable. One girl even said she was moving because of the "stupid" rules. I was told by a Mom who frequents the pool that she also one day jumped in the pool, and when she came up so did her bikini top. So the Mom's 14 year old son got a full view of nipple, as did her 2 younger kids. And the hooker did. not. even. care. Seriously?

Anyway...the limited guest rule's reason? Because we have a tiny (yet awesome) pool. I don't want your kid's birthday party or your family reunion going on while I'm trying to relax with Lil No-No on my off day from work. The throwing rule...again, I have a 15 month old sharing this tiny pool. Show some respect. The jumping rule, same reason. And the no toys rule was just added because they had to close the pool for a day due to a clogged filter.

Also, the first day of the Labor Day holiday, a baby pooped in the pool. All because their Mom didn't think a swim diaper is necessary. The pool was closed for a few days. Thanks Careless Mom. Way to wreck the holiday weekend for the rest of us.

So before you break a rule, no matter how stupid it seems, please stop to ask yourself why it might be in place in the first place. Maybe it's only because something happened to someone one time, they sued, and then we are affected. But the whole meaningless lawsuit thing is for another day.

*end rant*

So what are you ranting about tonight?

<3 Truvy

PS-I am now finished at 12:06am! Not too bad. =)

Wednesday, June 29, 2011

A Month's Worth of "Tuesday Night Noms"!

Dinner on the cheap. When you hear folks say that you automatically assume 'ugh ramen again'. Not here at Champagne Mommyhood!

Since we've been slacking lately (work, illness and the like) we're giving you a QUADRUPLE dose of "Tuesday Night Noms"!

To start:

Ouiser's 'Dog Food'

An ex of mine used to make this for us all the time. Hate the ex, stole his recipe*lol* At least he was good for something right? We'll overlook the fact that he was/is batshit crazy.

1 lb ground beef
1 1/3 c. minute rice
1 can cream of mushroom soup
minced onion
worcestshire sauce (to taste)

brown the beef with the worcestshire and mixed onion.
Boil the rice according to the directions
Drain beef, add boiled rice and 1 can of cream of mushroom soup.


Quick, easy and filling (and nutritious especially if you use brown rice)

Bastard Shepard's Pie

1 lb ground beef (seasoned with bbq or worcestshire sauce to your tastes), garlic, minced onion
peas or green beans
cheese (sliced or shredded)
instant mashed potatoes (or you can make your own from 'real potatoes' if you're so inclined)

Preheat oven to 400

brown the beef with your seasonings
add 1 can peas or green beans

Make your potatoes according to directions on box

in a dish (size doesn't matter as long as it all fits in the end!) layer the beef veggie mixture, sprinkle with cheese, layer mashed potatoes on top, sprinkle with cheese

Place in oven for 15-20 mins or until cheese is melty and potatoes are starting to brown just a little bit for that crusty goodness


BBQ Cheeseburger Pizza

1 box Jiffy Pizza Crust Mix
BBQ Sauce
1/2 lb ground beef
Cheddar Cheese
1/2 jar tomato sauce

Make pizza crust according to box directions.

Brown the beef. When sufficiently browned add in the BBQ sauce (to taste)
Spread the pizza sauce on the crust.
Layer the beef bbq mixture on top
Top with cheese
Bake 15-20 mins until cheese is bubbly.


Truvy's Crockpot Chicken Thingy (with Bonus Lunch!)

-1 pack of boneless skinless chicken breasts..mine had 3 decent breasts in it
-1 large can cream of chicken soup
-1 can chicken broth
-any veggies you want...this last time i use 1 can niblets corn and 1 can sweet peas, both drained...raw veggies work too!
-salt, to taste
-tony chachere's or cajun seasoning of you choice
-about a cup of italian bread crumbs (or plain if you like)
-hot sauce, i used frank's red hot

Crockpot Chicken Thingy:
chop 2/3 of your chicken boobs into cubes. combine cream of chicken, chicken broth (except for a little....leave a couple tablespoons in the can for now, veggies, chicken, and a little salt in your crockpot. cook at high for about 5 hours or low for about 8 hours. make sure our chicken is cooked throughout. i served this over biscuits that i cooked til they were just a little doughy, and it gave this chicken pot pie effect. the ultimate comfort food.

Bonus Lunch:
when you open your chicken package, take one of the breasts, unchopped, and put it in a baking dish...i used a shallow glass casserole dish. shakes some cajun seasoning and bread crumbs over it, and a little salt and pepper if you feel the need. flip the chicken a couple times to coat both sides. then, if you're up for it, splash some hot sauce over the top. pour the last little bit of chicken broth in the pan to keep it moist. i put it in a 375 degree-ish oven for about 20 minutes? when it was done, i combined it (sliced up) with a bag of predominantly spinach salad, some leftover almond accents (in the produce section with salad toppers), and some croutons. so good and juicy i didn't even need dressing!!!

Did you recreate any of these dishes? Snap a picture and let us know how it turned out!

Friday, June 24, 2011

Words We Use Entirely Too Much

A Friendly Handy Dandy Easy To Use Guide (which will be added to as we see fit)


Chokeaho-verb. The act you wish to commit to someone male or female who acts like a dumbass. Also used as a threat. Example- "dont make me go all chokeaho on your ass, Bitch!"


Loser- Ouiser's second husband whom she's in the process of divorcing but has been stymied by ancient technology. (see 'typewriter')

Meep-universal usage. Is a noun, verb, etc etc. Usually used in place of various swear words. Example: That mothermeeper just meeping cut my ass off in traffic. Also used as a warning to others. Example: meeeeeeep(said with shaking fist)

Memes-Truvy's addiction. See for details and hilarity. Do not be shocked if you see some pop up on the blog...especially if the blog is written after midnight and Mountain Dew is involved.


NQH- Not Quite Hubby. What Ouiser refers to her significant other Robert as, since they can't legally marry yet.

No-No - What Truvy is pretty sure Lil Bit thinks her name is lately.


Typewriter- An ancient piece of technology that  has stymied Ouiser and says she'd give her kingdom for so she can finalize her divorce from Loser and FINALLY marry NQH. Due to filing all paperwork herself, she's been told that a certain form has to be filled out using a typewriter. Which she does not have. Which NO ONE seems to have.


Winomail-noun. What Truvy sends out after partaking in Friday Night W(h)ine. Similar to 'drunk dialing' and 'drunk texting' and 'Black Cord Fever' (read Lewis Grizzard for a description of  'BCF').

Curse of the Red Bitch

Welcome to Ouiser's World of Hurt. I am seriously about to rip my uterus out with my barehands and be done with the whole deal. The bloaty, the crampy, the bitchy, the whiny, the bleedy without dying-y. I'm sick of it!

The RED BITCH has been a very bad girl indeed. You would think that FIFTEEN MONTHS after having Wee Man she'd see fit to act normally, but noooooooooooooooooo. Oh, she did for about 3 months and then she went to Hell and back and decided to drag me along for the ride. This last month alone, as in 30 days, she's been here for going on 17. She was here for fourteen, gone for a week and now she's BACK.

Effin' whore.

So, not only has the bitch put a real damper on any enjoyable Happy Adult Fun Time as shower boinking, while fun, gets old after a while ; I'm also having to invest in JUMBO PACKS of plug the flow supplies!. I guess I should be lucky I have a METRIC ASSLOAD of coupons to help defray the cost yeah? But sheesh!

I'm actually beginning to wonder if maybe I'm starting to go through menopause early. Like, SUPER SERIOUSLY EARLY. C'mon, Ol Ouiser's not THAT freaking old. I'm only THIRTY FOUR! On the other hand, the signs are there. Hot flashes, wonky cycles, thinning skin, especially on my face. There are lines there that weren't there previously, and of course that stray hair on my chinny chin chin. But it's too early!!

Granted, perhaps it's not a BAD thing. I'm through having wee ones (after one and 5 previous miscarriages due to a blood clotting disorder, some long ass latin name which boils down to I could throw a clot and die eventually since my blood clots TOO well), my tubes are tied. The factory for all intents and purposes is closed. Out of order. Out to lunch...keep on knocking but no one's home.

So in closing, send tampons, or adult diapers and some Veet or something lest I start looking like a Yeti. Mmmkay?


Thursday, June 23, 2011

A Crossroads....

Dear friends, I have reached a fork in my road of life. It has been extremely difficult for me to schedule in time to go to school now that I am working again. I have been quietly mulling over the idea of dropping out until things get a little more stable. The downside, of course, would be that in 6 months I get to start paying back my student loans. The upside would be that I could focus more energy into my AVON business, and I could ask for more hours at work. I aim to devote enough energy into my business to pay back my loan out of my AVON income, by the time it comes time to begin paying them back.

What would you do in this situation? I haven't even mentioned this to my hubby yet....just really thought about it earlier today. It just seems like the most logical financially. *sigh*

O well, that can wait until tomorrow.

<3 Truvy

We're Baaaaaack! With TikTokkyPortaPottyGoodness!

Okay so we totally suck donkey balls. We've all been sick, working or without our 'interwebz'. Perhaps all three and bedbugs? Whaaaa? You are NOT coming up here with that infested mess Truvy, just saying!

But it would probably be welcome after some of the whucktastical dreams I've had lately. I'm gonna blame the drugs personally. That's the ONLY logicial explaination. By drugs, I mean doctor prescribed, kill the infucktion type yeah.

The MOST whucktastical of which involved our heroes Kate and Lydia from Rants From Mommyland, whom we want to be like when and if we ever grow up. The details are sorta fuzzy but as I recall, it took place at a fair and involved a t-box drinking contest. Which for those of us on a beer budget...yeah you can kinda guess where that ended up. Next thing you know all of us are in porta potties puking our respective guts out in unison, to the tune (if you could call it that) of Ke$ha's 'Tik Tok'.

Oddly, it was kinda cool. But I woke up before I found out who won the contest.

I can see it now though....*shakes head*

Friday, June 3, 2011

Tonight We Dine In Itchy Hell...Please Pass The Meatloaf

As if my health wasn't screwy enough....over the past 2-3 weeks I have faced seasonal allergies (*yawn* so used to this cycle, bring it on), pink eye (what is this new fresh hell!?), and a sinus infection (did i swallow glass??). Now that all that fun stuff seems to be wrapping up, I am faced with a much darker nemesis. The evil *sha-sha-sha* *whispered* bed bug.
I feel like throwing anything cloth out...couches and bed included.....and most of our clothes...that part actually isn't such a bad idea. And to top things off, I don't get another off day until Monday. So, basically, I can't deal with the pesky demon until then.
I do believe I identified the offending infested fabric delight. Just so happens it is my wonderful pluuuuush mattress pad that makes you feel like you're sleeping on cotton candy. I just washed it the other day, the fricking day before I noticed my first bite. It is now sitting outside the front door waiting to be whisked away to le dumpster.
Has anyone dealt with this tiny evil before? I am totally open to any and all tips you have for me.
Until then, I will spend tonight on the couch. And every night until I can beat these suckers.
I'm totally going Chuck Norris on them.
<3 Truvy

Thursday, June 2, 2011

Our First Guest Post!

Ouiser and I have been a bit under the weather. Our sincerest apologies. I am on my second day of a nightly routine of eat, 2 horse pill antibiotics, 2 sprays of nasal spray per nostril, 1 drop for each eye, and a tsp of lovely prescription cough syrup. So we called in the reinforcements. So, ladies and gentlemen, my awesome mommy friend Kristina answered the call with some amazing (and cheap!) ideas to entertain younguns of any age.

<3 Truvy


Hello all! I guess I should introduce myself first- I am Kristina, I have known Truvy for 6 years. I am the proud and exhausted mother of 2 under 2 (for 8 more days!) and a military wife. Translation = poor. Very, very poor, enabling me to be fiercly creative and totally cheap when trying to keep my kids entertained. Here are a few crafts you can do with your kids for under $5 each! Don’t let age limit your kids’ artistic abilities, and don’t worry what they will think of your art. Trust me… my almost 2 year-old doesn’t hesitate to say “No Mom! Paint like dis. Paint like Georgia Grace.” I am incredibly artistically challenged. I just tell her I can do it how I want to! (Yes, she runs this household). Anyhoo… here ya go.

1.      Recycled junk = toys!
Whilst attempting to make beef stroganoff (recipe anyone?) my little lady who was around 10 months at the time was hanging on to the back of my knees for dear life. What can I do to entertain her? Expanding on a friend’s idea, I washed the sour cream container, dried it thoroughly and tossed in some dry noodles. Of course this needed to be sealed so my clever little princess couldn’t access the choking hazard inside so I taped it up. I highly recommend gluing any of you creations with nail glue or hot glue. Some alternate ideas are: water bottle with rice, ketchup bottle and mac noodles, quaker oats tube and those dried beans you always say you are going to make but don’t have a clue what to do with. Just make sure to dispose of these musical instruments after a few months if you suspect any molding. Bleck! Final cost? Under $2 for rice, beans, etc.

2.      Scratch and sniff paint? Wait really? Yes really!
Grab a few packets of kool-aid mix at the store mix em individually in about 1/3 c water (more or less based on how much you need) , and let their imaginations go bananas! I love to use any chance I can to explain to the little lady how colors work. She knows almost all her colors but thinks pink rules the world. The best part is that when they are done painting with this completely safe to eat (and they will prob taste it) paint, it smells like a sangria… which is the closest thing to a drink I will get before bedtime =) final cost? Depends on how many colors you use but usually less than $2
3.      Marble art is a little more expensive but a ton of fun!           
Take a shoebox (diaper box, hamburger helper box, etc) Dip a marble (pebble, large bead, golf ball) in one color of paint. Turn on the music and let your cutie bug shake the box to the beat. Rinse marble and dip in next color. Turn on a new song and rock out! Tear open your box if you used a recycled package and see the awesome marbled results! Under $5 depending on how many paints you buy.

4.      Need to make your own paint? Bring 2 cups water to a boil and slowly add 1 cup flour and stir until it’s like gravy. Simmer for about 5 mins to thicken. Pour into separate containers and add food coloring or left over kool-aid mix. Let cool. My 5–month-old sweetie bug looooooves painting with his feet!  Under $2 depending on cost of food coloring.

Thanks for letting me join you tonight and have a great time introducing your kids to art and music! My diva and future qb are tucked in for the night so I must do the domestic goddess gig. Or I could curl up and catch up on 16 and Pregnant.

Remember… “Imagination is more important than knowledge"- Albert Einstein

Friday, May 27, 2011

Time for W(h)ine!

Do you have your glass of wine? Go ahead. I'll wait.

*elevator music plays softly in the background*

Um, you're gonna need to pour more in your glass than that. Now go! And hurry back! Don't spill any!

*elevator music continues*

Ah. Much better!


My favorite color and my best feature do not pair well.

That's right.....I have *dramatic music* the Pink Eye.

DISCLAIMER: My dates may be completely off. My head feels like death.

I totally am blaming the child on this one. One day my Mom told me to find alternative childcare for the day...looked like my dad had the Pink Eye. Done. Crisis averted. *mutters* Damn incubation period.

A couple days later, Monday, I took the Short One to the doc doc to see if she had an ear infection. While we were in. the. car. Lil Bit developed a wee little runny nose. Meh. It's normal. My allergies were raging, so I assumed hers were starting up since she had an allergy attack every time I did this winter. She weighed in at a whopping 20.4 pounds (always the tiny one...remember, she's 14 months, for crying out loud). The doc doc gets to us. No ear infection. No nothing wrong. Apparently she has been batting at her ear because of her molars coming in. Yay! I don't have to remember to give her an antibiotic every day! *a mist of impending doom fills the room* We get the heck outta dodge and back to la casa.

*Later that evening...actually like an hour after we got home* All of a sudden I notice an eye booger. Meh, maybe just allergies. She gets a wee bit goopier through the night. Nothing major. And *BAM* she wakes up the next morning and I have to pry her poor little eyes apart. I call the doc doc and they go ahead and call in a prescription for eye drops. Hubby watches her while I go to work. Lalala. We get her prescription that night and discover the joy of giving a 14 month old eye drops. -.- I would rather be tasked with remembering to give her a dose of amoxicillin every 5 minutes. And tell me this…how am I supposed to tell a 14 month old to gently close her eyes, not blink, and keep her eyes closed for 1 to 2 minutes!?!?!? Gah. I’m lucky if she doesn’t rub her eyes 3 seconds after.

The next day is fairly uneventful. Except that my brother-in-law decided to invite every frickin cousin in the area (a metric buttload) over for a BBQ. Wonderful. Pink eye kid. Allergy Mommy. Splendid. I spent the day on the couch watching DVDs and trying to relax on my day off of work while people swarmed my house.  Everyone finally left. And then it starts. My left eye began to ooze a little and ache. Greeeaaat. I kept waking up in the middle of the night prying it open b/c it was starting to swell and stick together. Ick.

So I go to the doctor Friday morning (like I said, brain is clue what happened Thursday...I know I worked Thursday, but no clue what else happened...maybe that night my eye started instead of Wednesday??? anywho...) w/ Short One in tow b/c all my go-to baby sitters were working and Hubs was completely exhausted from work. Worked out pretty good tho b/c I woulda been bored to tears without her. Lol. And she did really well strapped in her stroller for 2 hours. I was shocked!! I gave her a Martha Stewart LIVING to look through and she had it propped up, turning pages, and everything! But back to the story...I hadn't seen my Family Practitioner since I was in college back in like late 2005 to early 2006...I remember because I went in about my allergies, and I was living in the dorm that they tore down later on. So I had to come in as a new patient...which also meant more to pay than if I was existing. Boo. But it all worked out. Considering the puffiness and ooziness and the fact my Dad and Short One had been diagnosed with the Pink Eye, my diagnosis was easy peasy. He went ahead and did  once over anyway. Apparently I have an abnormal heart rhythm. Soooo they did an EKG, which turned out normal. That was the first time anyone other than my Hubs had seen my boob since I was breast-feeding. Ha! The little paper vest ripped as soon as I put it on because I'm awkward like that. Then I discussed a couple things with the doctor, and I will be returning early July to see if I need hormones. Until then I get to act like I'm trying to get pregnant and take my temperature at the same time every morning...AND write it down. Woo! So I guess some good did come from this mess. Aside from how sexy I look in the morning when my eyes are swollen shut. ;)

So there! Our inaugural Friday Night W(h)ine is complete! =)

Time for my eye drops. O boy. And then I will be calling it a night. I think I'm having a hot flash. Lol. Since I am writing this on a Saturday night/Sunday morning, disregard the loopiness.

Stay tuned for our beauty mission of the night!

Now go refill your glass! =)

Monday, May 16, 2011

Tuesday Night Noms/Mommy on the Fly

Ouiser here. Been a wee bit busy with work and whatnots, and for the next week or so I'll have Not Quite Hubby here at home due to medical reasons (bleh...medical reasons not the fact that he's here, although if he takes to ringing a bell or something we may have issues*lol*)

What this invariably means however is that due to new monetary constraints and belt tightening you'll be seeing a LOT of "Mommy on the Fly" articles which will usually coincide with Tuesday Night Noms.

Saturday Night. 8 p.m. I'd told NQH before I left for work that I was planning on making pizza that night when I got home. This is no big deal. Granted, my crusts tend to be lopsided, but what the hey, it's edible so nyeah! So I get home, start getting my stuff together and...

No yeast.

I look in the drawer where I usually keep it. No dice (yeast). Look in the pantry. Nope. Nada. No yeastie goodness to be found. Sad thing is, I just bought a three pack right before Christmas and DID NOT USE IT. So it's around here somewhere. Either that or the dust bats are using it to try and bulk up to overrun us (see Maidless Mondays)

What's a mommy to do? Pizza was promised and I MUST DELIVER.

I spy a box of Bisquik.

A thunk occurs. I scan the box and see a recipe for "Italian Pizza Bake". I can work with this. We'll overlook that I don't have half of what the actual recipe calls I modify for what I DO have...

The Actual Recipe:

1/3 c bisquick
2 tbsp fat free egg product or one egg white
1 Tbsp water
1/8 tsp garlic powder
1/4 c diced green or yellow pepper
1/4 c. chopped onion
1/2 c. cut up cooked chicken breast
1/2 c. canned diced tomatoes with italian herbs, drained
1/4 tsp italian seasoning
1/4 c. shredded reduced fat mozzarella cheese

heat oven to 400F. Spray 8x4 loaf pan, Stir bisquick mix, egg water and garlic powder, spread in pan.

cook pepper and onion in non stick skillet over medium high heet until onion is tender, stir in chicken, tomatoes and seasoning. heat until hot. Spoon over batter in pan. Sprinkle with cheese.

Bake 20-23 mins until golden brown.

Mommy on the Fly Modification:

2/3 c. Bisquick
2 egg whites
garlic powder to taste
2 Tbsp water

1lb found beef
chopped diced onion. as much as you like
1 can of diced tomatoes with green chiles
8 oz Mexican blend cheese (to start*lol*)

heat oven to 400 F

mix the bisquick, egg whites garlic powder and water together, spread in a 9x13 baking dish.

brown the ground beef with the onions, once it's done add in the can of tomatoes. spread mixture in baking dish on top of crust. throw the cheese on.

Bake 20-25 minutes until golden and bubbly. Throw on more cheese if you'd like.


Makes 4 servings.

Maidless Monday

Are you ready?

Don't worry, we are going to ease into this. Today we will vacuum. If you don't feel like it, blame Ouiser. ;) If you have hardwood, laminate, etc, break out the broom/swiffer/mop and get to work. I'm lucky enough to have carpet AND hardwood laminate. O boy! If, like me, you are in the middle of decluttering that may or may not have been started 2 months ago, don't not do this because you have stuff on the floor. Just go around it. It's better to have half a clean floor than no clean floor at all. While you have the supplies out, look up and see if the dust bats have taken over your corners, fans, and light fixtures yet.

Now stand back. Ah. Dust has been reduced. Crunchy things aren't sticking to your feet. You could get used to this, huh? If you don't have time, don't worry. Just do what you can. That's less you will have to do later. NO EXCUSES. =)

And now for me to practice what I preach. *hangs head low* But this couch is sooooo comfy!!! *scowl* Fine. You win. I guess I will go clean now.

<3 Truvy

Sunday SuNdAy SUNDAY!!!!

Okay, this would have been sooner....but I had a quart of paint to win. =p By the way, Glidden is giving away a total of 200,000 quarts of paint in one of 306 colors, so head to ASAP. Pronto! Nao! =) One per household, please.

(be advised that it took almost an HOUR to get it to go through as there were a LOT of people trying at the same time, but be patient!!---O.)

Onto serious business. I will list here the high value and rare coupons I got in today's (well, tomorrow's) paper. =) This segment is a work in progress, so bear with me. Also, feel free to give feedback. =) If anything else, use this to see if you need to call your paper company in the morning to order a back issue or not. =D

05/15/11 Redplum
B1G1 Gillette deodorant, up to $4.99
$2/1 Gillette body wash
$1.50/1 Milo's Kitchen dog treats, 3.3 oz or smaller
$2/1 Milo's Kitchen dog treats, 10 oz or larger
$2/1 Venus razor or disposable razor
$2/1 Venus refill
$3/1 Nivea Happy Sensations daily lotion
$1/1 Nivea body wash for women

05/15/11 SmartSource
8 Steak and Shake coupons
2 Red Lobster coupons
$1/1 Lunchables with fruit
$1/1 Oscar Mayer sub or flatbread sandwiches, cracker combos, or NEW sandwich combos
$0.75/1 Oscar Mayer lower sodium turkey bacon
$1/2 Oscar Mayer hot dogs
$1/2 Oscar Mayer deli fresh or one pound shaved lunch meats
$1/1 Oscar Mayer sandwich combos
$2/1 Huggies Little Swimmers
$1/1 Huggies Little Swimmers sun care product
$1.50/1 Pull-Ups training pants, jumbo pack or larger
$1/1 Pull-Ups flushable wipes, excludes trial size
$1/1 Dole salad blends
$2.50/1 Huggies Pure & Natural diapers
$2/1 Huggies Little Snugglers or Little Movers diapers
$0.50/1 Huggies baby wipes, 64 ct or larger
$0.75/1 Colgate ProClinical toothpaste
3 Logan's Roadhouse coupons
$0.75/1 Planters Nut-rition bars or Big Nut bars, 5 ct each
$1/2 Kraft Mayo or miracle Whip, 22 oz or larger
Save $10 on PROACTIV 3-step solution, includes free shipping
$2/1 Olay Total Effects moisturizer or facial cleanser
$3/1 Scrubbing Bubbles Fresh Brush 2-in-1 starter kit or refill pack
6 Chuck-E-Cheese coupons

<3 Truvy

Sunday, May 15, 2011

Pardon The Interruption.

We have been slacking. *slap eachother on the wrist*
BUT we have come up with a daily posting schedule to give us some guidance so we don't just stare at the screen and chat on Facebook. So, without further ado, our posting schedule:

Sunday: A review of the coupons and circulars that came in the Sunday paper.
Monday: We will focus on our homes. Cleaning, decorating, etc.
Tuesday: We will share a recipe that can be bought with coupons and deals from the current paper/circulars. Also, a piece called "Mommy on the Fly" that we think of quickly, that can be implemented quickly and cheaply!
Wednesday: A review of the grocery circulars released on Wednesdays.
Thursday: A list of Freebies we have found and other deals.
Friday: We will be having a segment called Friday Night Mommy's W(h)ine. This will ranting about random things, a nice glass of wine (or your favorite non-alcoholic beverage), a beauty mission, and live chats (unless we are working or dealing with sick babies, etc...).
Saturday: We will post a fun activity to do with the family today (or during your work weekend), as well as a reminder to get your Sunday paper in the morning.

=) There it is! We appreciate feedback. If there is something you want to see (example: you have been looking for a reason to clean out your tupperware cabinet and want others to suffer with you) let us know!


Monday, May 2, 2011

Something to Cheer About

While the events of the last week have been devestating to say the least, we can finally say that there's something to cheer about.

Osama Bin Laden is dead!

While we all know that this is not the end of terrorism (which sadly will always exist in some form, whether foriegn or domestic), we can rest a bit easier(maybe) knowing that the mastermind behind the deaths of thousands of Americans (and others) has been brought to justice so to speak.

There will be those who claim that the timing of the announcement is odd, (birth certificate malarkey anyone?) there is no denying that this is good news nonetheless.

Oddly, I learned of the news the same way I learned of Saddam Hussein's capture in the spider hole. I woke up to a message telling me the news. It's also worth noting that on May 1st 1945, German dictator Adolf Hitler was declared dead as well.

But this is not a political blog(and we should be thankful*lol*) but I felt that this was definitely news worth sharing. And now we go back to our normal 'scheduled' bloggy goodness :)


Thursday, April 28, 2011

Something Serious

Today, we here at Champagne Mommyhood are taking a departure from our normal lighthearted bantering and helpful money saving tips to pay tribute to the victims of the April 25-28 2011 Tornado Outbreak. We're also going to tell you how you can help and where to find information as we find it as well.

We ourselves being in the South (sorry ladies I'm using our real names at this point-Shiloh/Ouiser-KY/TN, Aimee/Truvy-AL and Meg/M'Lynn-GA) we were affected by this as well. We either live very closely to the areas affected, know someone in the areas affected or have actually LIVED in the areas affected.

Up here in northern TN/South Central KY  we were spared the devestation that occurred to our neighbors south, but barely. Had the system not taken that last minute turn...I don't even want to think about it quite honestly. The night this all started I had made a judgement call and packed up the important belongings and rented a motel room for myself, Robert(Not Quite Hubby) and Will (Wee Man). The three of us live in a mobile home. I was not willing to take the chance.

Camped in the motel with my laptop, television and cellphone, I waited. I was waiting for Robert to get off work as we were expecting 'all Hell to break loose' around the time he got off (midnight). As I was watching the systems push toward Clarksville (TN) I naturally grew more nervous. Finally close to midnight, the warnings started. I received a text from Robert telling me the sirens were going off. At the motel which is next to the interstate, I opened the door and saw and heard nothing. While there was rotation downtown there were no touchdowns. A few minutes later, I open the door again and the wind was picking up really good...a minute later we lost power. That's when the rotation was passing almost directly overhead. Thankfully it moved on and the power came back on about a minute or two later. I had grabbed Will and was cowering under the sink/vanity area in the room. About 15 minutes later Robert arrived. Save for a short nap, I spent the next 12-18 hours glued to the laptop,watching the Weather Channel and pinging for updates from friends to the south.

As for what happens next...I'll let Aimee and Meg pick up that end of the story...

If you've seen the pictures, heard the reports, the damage is just unfathomable, and I have no words beyond that.

I've been researching today though and I've found some links and or information that may be of use to those wishing to help and get more information:

Latest News: (serves the Chattanooga area and NW GA) (Tuscaloosa, AL) (Birmingham, AL) (Huntsville, AL)

To donate blood:

To donate money:

Text "GIVE" to 80888 to donate 10 dollars to relief efforts in TN, AL and GA (this is via the Salvation Army)

text "REDCROSS" to 90999 to make a $10 donation.

Other sites:

There are also a number of sites on Facebook right now as well:

Pictures and Documents Found
Toomers for Tuscaloosa

There are more and I'm slowly getting to them as we speak. It's taking time of course as I'm trying to keep up with Will and stuff.
We'll keep updating this list as the information becomes available.

Sunday, April 24, 2011

Honey, I Can't Feel My Feet -or- Why Must Mommy Work?

Oi! I just got home from my 4th day of work in a row and have 2 more days ahead of me to face. Did I mention the next 2 days I have to leave the house before 8am? -.- Not cool.(Be glad you don't work overnights then. I did. The entire time I was pregnant. It blew donkey balls. You ever try chasing after a beer thief seven and a half months preggo, in crocs no less?---O.)

I loved my Stay-At-Home-Mommy status when I had it. Stay-At-Home-Except-For-School-Mommy status was good too. I-Only-Use-My-Home-For-Sleeping-And-Showering-Mommy status, however, can suck it. I'm about to take a leave from school though, so that will help.

But, for a moment, let's step back and celebrate the joys of staying at home, as well as those of getting to leave your house without a diaper bag for a few hours a day. =D

*I have plenty of time to clean my house.(Yes, the pix of your sparkling sink were testament to that!)
*I get to spend all the time I want cuddling with my baby and seeing her grow.(SQUEE!!!!!---O.)
*Planning my grocery shopping trip can take hours and hours and it's okay!
*I don't have to get dressed if I don't want to. (But to avoid scaring animals and small children, like me, you get dressed, even if it's half assed---O.)
*I can spend all summer at the pool.(Sunlight baaaaaad, darkness GOOOOOOD!!!---O.)

Working Mommy <3
*The Hubby feels compelled to share the housework more.
*I have a silent victory when the baby cries when I must leave her, and I get mucho hugs and giggles when I return.
*Since I am a cashier, I stay pretty up-to-date on deals and new products.
*I get to wear actual clothes, and I actually wear a bra every day!
*I get to be around ADULTS.

Of course, as with most things, there are cons to each side...

SAHM </3
*Even with all this time, my house is a wreck.(but her sink still sparkles!---O.)
*I look like a crazy lady at the grocery store because I'm so used to chatting with my mini partner in crime.(yeah but wait til she starts talking back! THEN you're in trouble*lol*---O.)
*Even with all the time, my grocery list is still half-hearted and rushed.
*I live in pajamas.(PAJAMA JEANS WOMAN!!!---O.)
*I will spend all summer being lazy inside because my pajamas are comfy and my body looks gross in a swimsuit...and I can never take advantage of the on-site gym due to my tagalong.

Working Mommy </3
*The Hubby still doesn't do as much as needs to be done to keep the house clean...which discourages me from cleaning.
*I miss my little one more than anything! Every time a kid comes thru my line it makes me want to clock out and go home to play and snuggle.
*I spend all day ringing up things I long for, but can't afford.
*I have to put on clothes...and that padded, underwired torture device.(I cut the underwire out of mine, or in the case of the WaterBra, it was already half way out when I bought it...THAT thing is a torture device---O)
*Adults don't always appreciate poo consistency...and I'm socially awkward enough as it is. =/

By the way....I actually just got home from my FIFTH straight day...I got done with the pros last night and could stay awake any longer. And to bed I now head, seeing as I have another 8am shift in the morning. Joy.

Happy Easter from the Champagne Mommyhood gals!

<3 Truvy